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A look at “discipline” around the league, Part I

December 2, 2009

News that Carlos Dunlap, DE for THE FLORIDA was arrested for a DUI earlier in the week became a “distraction” for the team’s preparation for ‘Bama this upcoming weekend. Coach Urban Meyer suspended Dunlap indefinitely and he will not play against ‘Bama in the SEC Championship game.

Between that news and this absolute gem courtesy of WRAS, Joe wanted to pose the hypothetical question to coaches around the SEC West (the East takes longer) about how they would handle the same situation given the week of a SEC Championship game.*

LSU Coach Les “Madhatter” Miles

LM: “I can only tell you that key management behind the wheel was the issue. It’s my fault that we didn’t have enough time to get there to spike the keys on the ground before our player got behind the wheel.”

Joe Auburn: “But Coach Miles, will you comment on his status for Saturday’s game?”

LM: “Oh he’ll play alright. Our fans drive drunk all the time and that is enough for me.”

Ole Miss Coach Houston “the Nutt”

HN: “There’s a confidence level there, and he’s better in the huddle. You can see when there’s pressure he’s doing things better, getting in the passenger seat instead for example, not falling asleep. He hasn’t driven in the last couple days. We’ve been real pleased with that.”

Joe Auburn: “But Coach Nutt, do you think he’ll play in this Saturday’s game?”

HN: “I do, because of the practice habits and attitude. That’s how I gauge our players. Especially when you’ve had a tough run the last few weeks.”

Mississippi State Coach Dan Mullen

DM: “Your job as coaches is putting your team and players in the best situation. We’ve tried to do that and the discipline has kind of evolved around the players.”

Joe Auburn: “So does that mean the team will discipline him instead? Will he play Saturday?”

DM: “Everybody’s pretty sad around here. He was a good kid and a great personality. It’s just a tragedy.”

Joe Auburn: “So does he play Saturday?”

DM: “How about some questions about the Egg Bowl instead?”

Arkansas Coach Bobby Petrino

BP: “I don’t know exactly what happened. That’s something that you’ve got to look at the video and see.”

Joe Auburn: “What does that mean for playing time on Saturday?”

BP: “This is the type of game that challenges a team’s leadership. We can either come together or fall apart.”

Joe Auburn: “Should I repeat the question?”

BP: “Who let you in here? Someone from the AJC? The Falcons front office?!”

Alabama Coach Nick Saban

NS: “We need a little time to figure that out. We’re going to take it from where it is and build for 12 games.”

Joe Auburn: “So Coach, you’re at the end of the season and facing Florida in the SEC Championship. You don’t have 12 games to build on this year. Does he play or not?”

NS: “Just like in Scent of a Woman , you know, when the guy is up there and Al Pacino gives the speech to the headmaster — give him a chance.”

Joe Auburn: “So he plays then, right?”

NS: “We have an idea of how we’re going to use him, but we don’t have an idea of where he is in terms of how much we’ll use him. There’s a difference. You try to bring players back role-wise without putting them at risk for injury.”

Joe Auburn: “I wasn’t aware he was injured. Did that happen during the arrest?”

NS: “That issue has gone under the bridge, under the next bridge, over the next dam and is gone.”

Joe Auburn: “But -”

NS: “I know you’re going to ask me, ‘What are you going to do about it?’ And I’m going to tell you right now, I’m not sure.”

Joe Auburn: “But Urban Meyer suspended his player for the game.”

NS: “What happens to everybody else has nothing to do with us, understand? And furthermore, I’ll ask the damn questions from now on, you hear?!”

Auburn Coach Gene Chizik:

GC: “That player has been suspended indefinitely. He doesn’t know what it means to be an Auburn man yet, and when he learns we’ll reevaluate where he stands with the team and the Auburn family at that time.”

Joe Auburn: “So…..what do we do with the rest of the press conference now that question is out of the way?”

GC: “We’ll handle that day-to-day.”

*This was purely for entertainment purposes only. I have about as much chance of interviewing coaches as I do of making Auburn’s roster next fall


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